Clement Crabbe ; More From Our Columnist, the Scabrous Clement Crabbe, of the Rockpools Register,Who Takes a Wry, Whimsical Look at a World Increasingly Beyond Parody

Summary

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DETECTIVE Inspector Andy Starch was just finishing a midmorning pastry at New Scotland Yard when he heard a commotion. 'We've got a man who needs help!

Call the medics!' Starch rushed into the corridor to find his loyal sidekick, 'Smudger' Singh, being carried by several other officers. 'You'll be all right now, Smudge,' said one of them. 'It's okay, mate.

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Clement Crabbe ; More From Our Columnist, the Scabrous Clement Crabbe, of the Rockpools Register,Who Takes a Wry, Whimsical Look at a World Increasingly Beyond Parody

We've called for help. Got you just in time. Stay in there, lad!'

Naturally Starch started to ask what had happened. But by now Smudger was jabbering.

'Oh, it was horrible,' he said. 'Just horrible. The sound of her voice. I couldn't bear it. I've never heard anything so terrible in all my life.' A q...

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